Age-17 years old

What should I do now? Should I die? Yes, I should die. After today's incident, I don't wanna live. He touched me so badly. I always thought him as like my elder brother. But how could he do this to me.

My mother and elder brother are still knocking at my door which I can hear from my bathroom. I don't wanna face them. Even I don't wanna face anyone after today. So, I have already taken my decision. There is a blade in my hand. It's from my sharpener. I took it from my geometry box. I didn't find any blade in my room. So I took it. There are so many bruises in my body. I did this by my nail. I am feeling so much impure. So I cut my body through my nail.

Once again I closed my eyes. First I saw the face of my mumma and bhaiya and I smiled. Then again that horrible moment flashed and I opened my eyes. No no I can't take this anymore. Then I pressed the blade in my wrist and gave it a pull. Blood gushed out and suddenly I started feeling dizzy. Everything was getting blurry in front of me. Before closing my eyes I just said,

"Sorry mumma, sorry Bhaiya."

Age-23 years old

Today I am so happy and also so sad. I am happy because as an intern Doctor today is my first OT with senior doctors and sad because it's a suicidal case and I hate suicidal case. It's so painful when you see in front of your eyes that loved ones may be taking their last breaths. But you can't do anything.

I always wanted to become a heart surgeon. I thought my first OT visit with senior doctors will be a heart surgery. But no it's a suicidal case. So now I am in front of the OT. The operation will be start in some minutes.

We step into the operation theatre. There are also two lady intern doctor with us. As a intern our duty is just watching and hearing everything of senior doctors.

In operation theatre, I step towards the bed and stand behind the patient's head. It's a girl may be 17/18 years old. But when I look at her face, my breath hitched. How beautiful she is. God has made her with so much time may be. There is an another peace in her face like she got something most awaited.

But why did she attempt suicide. There are so many bruises in her body. A cut mark in her wrist. But doctor are saying that it's not so deep. But she lost so much blood. If her family didn't take her in the hospital right time, it would have been so difficult for her to survive. Still she is not out of danger. I just have a wish to the GOD that please save her GOD.

THANK YOU.